Every year, I make a resolution to stop putting my efforts into friendships that don't really exist anymore, and to stop letting people walk all over me.  Then every year I am thoroughly disappointed in myself for not living up to my resolutions, and then feel worse in thinking that I am doing something wrong to make people treat me this way.


I've finally come to realize, there are just a lot of selfish / careless / ignorant / not-so-good people in the world, and THAT is not my fault.  I can't change their ways, but where I go wrong is that I keep holding onto them in hopes that I will find a way to change them into a real friend.


At my current job, I've found some of the most real and true friends I've ever had.  Perhaps I've altered how I go about forming friendships, and that's the only reason.  But really I think there are just a lot of "crappy friends" out there, and some "really true friends," and it's just a matter of whether you settle for the mediocre ones.  I'm done settling, or I realized I will never ever be happy.  I know I always seem to be complaining about something, and I think this is a big reason why.  If I keep people around that aren't really friends to me, I'm going to keep getting hurt and ditched by my "friends."  But I've found a bunch of amazing people at work, and I'm just going to try and focus on that.

Verse 1
Do you know that I see you
Every time you pass me by?
I've gotten so good at hiding it,
But I see everything
Out the corner of my eye.
As the hour passes I listen
For the sound of your approaching voice.
As it nears, I try to focus--
To seem indifferent,
But I just want to rejoice.

Chorus
I'm already hooked--
Can't you see?
You keep taking the
Breath out of me.
I'm infatuated--
I'm spinning fast,
Waiting to fall
Into your arms at last.

Verse 2
Do you  know I think about you
In the middle of the night?
The sweetest dreams I ever had,
So some of it
Just has to turn out right.
As a new day breaks I wait
For the bittersweet reality
To wake me from my happiness
And bring new hope
In all of its entirety.

Chorus
I'm already hooked--
Can't you see?
You keep taking the
Breath out of me.
Intoxication--
Spinning so fast,
Waiting to fall
Into your arms at last.

-K.K.

Somehow, I"m doing really good in school.  As most of you know, I skipped more classes than I actually went to at Whitewater.  But now, a 45 minute drive to school has seemed to curb that habit.

I am currently at about a 99% in Microbiology and also in Biochemistry.

I'm at 100% in Native American Literature (I would hope so, since I have an English/Writing degree!)

And.......


I am at 100% in Economics!!!!  Seriously, that stuff always goes right over my head, and what seems "so easy" to most gets me completely confused.  Yet, I am doing the best out of the other students, and he makes it understandable.


So yay!  The only drawback is that I still feel like I have no social life since I work full time (which is also 45 minutes from home, and about 6 blocks from school).  For 6 days a week I work/have school, and my only days off every week are Tuesday.  The only problem is I have soooo much homework and only 1 day to get it all done and study, so I literally never have time for friends or to just relax.  And this is only my first semester! (Well technically I started in summer, since I took 7 credits then).